Has anyone read this article: Escaping the "Mommy Guilt" trap ? A BabyCenter poll finds that 94 percent of moms say they feel guilty.
I'm in the 6% - Is that BAD?!
I have to admit that I was starting wondering if there was something wrong with me for NOT having Mommy Guilt. Perhaps I am too new as a mommy to have developed this?? I'm really not sure. Should I feel guilty for not feeling guilty? I do think about the day when our son learns to speak and express his feelings. I wonder how I will cope when hearing things like "mommy, please don't go" and such?? I am glad that I read the article to help me deal with those feelings of guilt if and when they do develop.
I do work outside of the home but I am five to ten minutes away from being with our child (depending on the traffic lights between work to home). The proximity eases my mind quite a bit. At first I did contemplate what it would be like to stay home with him but I am more than happy with our current situation. I am able to contribute financially to our household and I know that we are doing what is best for our son and his future. We will reevaluate our situation as his needs change but for now it is working out very well. I admit that I do have my worries while we are away from our son but I wouldn't classify it as guilt. For example: I worry if he should get hurt - but this can happen if his daddy or I are on watch that day. We know that he is in the loving and watchful care of his grandmother. We see that he is happy, healthy and so very excited to see us when we return from our workday. Mom (his & mine) raised us and my husband & myself both turned out just fine! Better is the care that our son gets from our mothers than we did when they raised us - as grandmas are already experienced Mommies. A Mom that that has graduated if you will. We trust her. We even find that he naps better when she's with him. I also believe that since he has very early on observed us leave and return that he will be more confident in knowing that if we happen to go out for a while without him that we will always, always come back. This may prove helpful when he is older and we take off on a date night.
I don't really have the luxury of time to write more on the Mommy Guilt subject at the moment. A revisit to this topic would be more ideal.
On to other "guilt" topics... One that I do have more than "Mommy Guilt" is "Wife Guilt". Sometimes (OK a lot of the time) I feel like I haven't been the best wife that I could be because of my other roles in both career and motherhood. I do my best to thank my husband daily. I compliment him on all of his efforts in our new life as parents. I know that these efforts are not enough though. I am still trying to figure out how to balance everything out. Suggestions on how to escape "Wife Guilt"?
I'm in the 6% - Is that BAD?!
I have to admit that I was starting wondering if there was something wrong with me for NOT having Mommy Guilt. Perhaps I am too new as a mommy to have developed this?? I'm really not sure. Should I feel guilty for not feeling guilty? I do think about the day when our son learns to speak and express his feelings. I wonder how I will cope when hearing things like "mommy, please don't go" and such?? I am glad that I read the article to help me deal with those feelings of guilt if and when they do develop.
I do work outside of the home but I am five to ten minutes away from being with our child (depending on the traffic lights between work to home). The proximity eases my mind quite a bit. At first I did contemplate what it would be like to stay home with him but I am more than happy with our current situation. I am able to contribute financially to our household and I know that we are doing what is best for our son and his future. We will reevaluate our situation as his needs change but for now it is working out very well. I admit that I do have my worries while we are away from our son but I wouldn't classify it as guilt. For example: I worry if he should get hurt - but this can happen if his daddy or I are on watch that day. We know that he is in the loving and watchful care of his grandmother. We see that he is happy, healthy and so very excited to see us when we return from our workday. Mom (his & mine) raised us and my husband & myself both turned out just fine! Better is the care that our son gets from our mothers than we did when they raised us - as grandmas are already experienced Mommies. A Mom that that has graduated if you will. We trust her. We even find that he naps better when she's with him. I also believe that since he has very early on observed us leave and return that he will be more confident in knowing that if we happen to go out for a while without him that we will always, always come back. This may prove helpful when he is older and we take off on a date night.
I don't really have the luxury of time to write more on the Mommy Guilt subject at the moment. A revisit to this topic would be more ideal.
On to other "guilt" topics... One that I do have more than "Mommy Guilt" is "Wife Guilt". Sometimes (OK a lot of the time) I feel like I haven't been the best wife that I could be because of my other roles in both career and motherhood. I do my best to thank my husband daily. I compliment him on all of his efforts in our new life as parents. I know that these efforts are not enough though. I am still trying to figure out how to balance everything out. Suggestions on how to escape "Wife Guilt"?
"mommy' guilt" I have plenty to go around. I hit the moment I returned to work, after having Addison and continues to this day. I hate that I did not get spend the same time with Addison as I did after having Jackson- by then I was a stay-at-home mom.
ReplyDeleteAnd I agree worry is much different than guilt... now let's not even get started on worry- I have a post, mostly completed, about worry...
But honestly I rater not feel guilty when there is clearly nothing I am guilty of.
I recieved the Versatile Blogger award and thought I'd pass it on to you!
ReplyDeletehttp://lifeas5.blogspot.com/2011/04/versatile-blogger-award.html
@mommysankey I'm sure the mommy guilt will kick in for me one day soon...I'm just a slow starter with everything I do.
ReplyDelete@Lindsay Thank you for sharing the Versatile Blogger Award with me! You made my day.
Cynthia
Friends, I'll be sharing update posts because there is a 4 year gap from then and now. Did I find my way to guilt? Stay tuned and find out in future posts!
ReplyDelete